You're Gonna Make Me Defend Lizzo Aren't You?
I'm just as shocked as anyone to find out she was eating fruit
A central crux of my last pieces has been “You have to defend the humanity and stand up for people you don’t like” which is something I deeply deeply believe. It’s easy for us to show up and defend the people we like, the people we think bring value in the world but you need hold the line for the people you don’t like, who you don’t find sympathetic, and in fact, it may be MORE important for you to show up for them. The subjects of the last few pieces were all people I felt some great pull of sympathy for, comedians, myself, teenagers, front men of my favorite bands, it was very easy to summon the passion to defend them. Well something in the void I’ve been screaming into heard me, and somewhere in the universe a finger on a monkeys paw just fucking curled.
American Pop Superstar Lizzo has found herself in the crosshairs this week after a bombshell lawsuit dropped brought by former backup dancers alleging both a hostile work environment and sexual harassment. The dancers allege they were criticized for gaining weight, pressured to eat bananas out of a dancers vagina at a strip club, and a whole host of other strange and damning allegations against the singer and her management company. This is of course, deeply ironic, considering that Lizzo is perhaps the perfect embodiment of the current entertainment landscape, building her brand around body positivity and female empowerment, as well as droning on and on about accountability and identity. At one point even blessing the world with the nuclear level woke take of "cancel culture is appropriation” earlier this year while not actually condemning it. No better time to sit down and engage with “has cancel culture gone too far?” once you’re at the top and the bones of the art world are at your feet. Lizzo denied the allegations and was immediately accused of gaslighting these dancers. I’m going to get in to why we gotta meet these people with compassion eventually, but this whole thing is undeniably really, really funny.
If you’ve spent more than 5 minutes waiting to fill a prescription in any pharmacy across America, you’re probably familiar with Lizzo’s work. She traffics in the kind of inoffensive pop music tailor made for shampoo commercials and the bachelorette parties of people who still strongly identify as “former gifted students”. Most of her music oscillates between two kinds of songs; on the one hand the disco funk that put Dr Luke on the map and brought Katy Perry and Bruno Mars to the top 15 years ago and on the other what I can only call Macklemore B-sides.
Lizzo is also black, a woman, and fat, which is like hitting an Uncut Gems level parlay of identity groups for the kinds of hyper wokes that make up music marketing departments and critical core. Her fat black femininity is at the center of her marketing, to the point where it eclipses her artistry. As cynical as it is, the marketing surrounding Lizzo is genius, it’s no coincidence that Lizzo broke into the mainstream with a major record deal in 2019, right as identity politics was itself making mainstream transition, after nearly a decade of toiling in relative obscurity. Record execs rightly figured out they could pump out the same songs they’ve always released, but by giving them to a fat black woman, the young white women who have always been the target audience of pop music would feel like heroes for buying the records they would’ve bought anyway and buy more of them because of it. The execs were right, Lizzo became an overnight sensation. Then everyone does that weird thing with Lizzo that they did with Michelle Obama where they act like she’s the prettiest smartest most talented woman to ever walk the planet because she checks certain minority boxes, in a strange dynamic that will eventually be reflected in a Get Out style movie. The cult of personality around Lizzo and her identity is intentional, they’re selling records on the weird sort of indulgences liberals do with minorities.
The central theme of her music is a fun bubbly narcissism self-love, which is the only kind of positivity to be found anywhere in this culture, and demanded by throngs of pop listeners who insist to be told they’re actually stunning and amazing. All Lizzo songs are anthems of faux, unearned self confidence by and for people who tweet all day about the anxiety they get when the self checkout lane is closed or treat having to meet their uberEats driver at the door as their own personal 9/11. Lizzo is the woman who rose to prominence with the line “just took a DNA test turns out I’m 100% that bitch” which is the kind of not really all that clever declaration of confidence that resonates with the dullest morons on the planet. It will be repeated ad nauseam emblazoned across Etsy t-shirts and social media bios of women who never have been and never will be “that bitch” in any situation. Your mother may have decorated the house with live, laugh, love, “gather” and “if I’m too much, seek less” signs, her daughter’s kitchen will be full of wall hanging driftwood with Lizzo lyrics painted on them.
Lizzo has made a name for herself as a superstar, because in a sea of dead eyed pop stars writing bitter screeds about their ex’s and “trauma”, Lizzo has an ounce of charisma. Don’t get confused, nothing Lizzo has ever released would ever make it as a b-side on a Missy Elliot record and even 10 years ago she would’ve been rightfully and roundly forgotten. But in a world of Phoebe Bridgers and Olivia Rodrigos, somebody who smiles, or even shows a little enthusiasm becomes a treat, and grading for a curve, Lizzo’s C+‘s become A’s. Lizzo acts as if she’s shattering some ceiling, that she’s the first plus sized black superstar, as if Aretha Franklin, Patti Labelle, Queen Latifah and a whole host of others haven’t stood exactly where she is, but that historical illiteracy or ignorance works for her, it moves records. Lizzo loves to run the playbook Taylor Swift pioneered, wherein you’re one of the most wealthy and powerful entertainers, propped up by the full power of an entire industry, yet constantly insist you’re the victim, being slighted by everyone around you.
She’s a pop star for this generation of runaway narcissism and strictly enforced mediocrity, her fanbase will never have to worry about the pangs of insecurity or existential dread looking at Lizzo they would with the previous norm of thin, super model pop stars, instead you’re seeing yourself “represented”. Lizzo isn’t beautiful because she’s beautiful, if you doubt me on that tell any of your female friends that they look like Lizzo and the kayfabe will break immediately. No, Lizzo is beautiful because she looks just like you, and you’re the most beautiful special thing in the world, which is why you demand every piece of culture affirm your beauty, intelligence and “validity” every waking moment. In fact maybe, you think, in your heart of hearts, you’re a little bit prettier, a little bit thinner, so when you demand everyone say Lizzo is beautiful not only are you showing that you’re a good person™️, you’re securing yourself a little spot as beautiful by proxy. Art is now ruled by the tyranny of the unremarkable 6’s who never got their Princess Diaries moment where everyone saw just how beautiful and smart they never were and are going to take it out on everyone, and Lizzo is their queen.
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Lizzo partially faces this fall out because she panders to these oversensitive puritans. She’s courted them her entire career and that’s partially why this lawsuit is upending her world so much. This isn’t the first time she’s found herself in the sights of the woke piranhas, actually a decent amount of this piece was written a year ago when she landed herself in hot water for using the term “spaz” in a song. Turns out “spaz” is an ableist slur, something I was shocked to find out, nearly as shocked as I was to learn anyone had used the term “spaz” to refer to anyone since 1997. My initial reaction to learning that Lizzo had used the word spaz in a song was surprise that it’s not a song about riding a bicycle with a massively oversized front wheel. The culture hall monitors descended on her, knowing full well she wasn’t insulting people who suffer from seizures, but they had found something they value more than Lizzo’s music for lowfat yogurt ads, something to be mad about. And instead of telling these people to kick rocks for being the insincere grievances mongers they are, that she’s the artist and won’t have her art dictated by the audience, she folded to them almost immediately, taking the song down and reuploading it without the word. Every publication on the planet has been insisting that Lizzo is this once in a lifetime artistic genius yet when push comes to shove has less artistic integrity than Dee fucking Snyder. The thing about these kinds of blood suckers is that once you let them in, they’re nearly impossible to get rid of, once you show them they can push you around, they’ll never stop.
When you actually dig into the nuts and bolts of what these backup dancers are alleging, there’s really not much there. She didn’t actually make any comments about the dancers weight, she said to one of them that she seemed “less committed to her role” which being interpreted as a dig about the dancers weight, is an insane jump, even for these people. There’s the allegation that a dancer was encouraged to eat a banana out of a strippers vagina at a party, which would’ve been considered a warmup for Axl Rose, if that’s the absolute worst thing you’ve experienced on the road and a deeply traumatic experience, consider another line of work. The lawsuit alleges that the people who would do social events outside of work with Lizzo received preferential treatment, which is shocking only to people who have never had a job, obviously people who get along with and are liked by their co-workers and bosses have advantages. The environment was also very competitive and demanding, but you’re a central part of a giant show for one of the biggest artists in the world, it’s not like the sound guy isn’t also a mistake away from being replaced. If you’re looking for job security or a corporate HR sensibilities, I’m going to tell you the arts are not the place for you, that doesn’t mean you have to accept insane harassment, but a cut throat and libertine environment is gonna be par for the course, even for adult Kidz Bop artists like Lizzo.
This all does lead to some interesting questions about who gets thrown out and who gets a path to redemption. The Hollywood Reporter ran a fairly positive piece about Lizzo insisting she has a way back and pulling all kinds of positive quotes, yet went out of their way to destroy Armie Hammer, Johnny Depp, Shia Labeuf, Casey Affleck etc when they faced civil suits. Lizzo at least appears to still have all of her industry support in light of the lawsuit, while Marilyn Manson lost label, management, and booking almost instantaneously after a mere allegation and has not had any of his support restored despite the lawsuits against him failing and investigations returning nothing. I mean the answer to why she gets a pass is because she’s a woman, and these people have no problem being hypocrites, but it does also show that at least conceptually, this culture is capable of nuance if it wants to, we’re not so far gone. If Jon Stewart’s entire tenure at the Daily Show showed us anything it’s that accusations of hypocrisy are meaningless when the people involve have no integrity, but if you can look past that you can at least see it’s not impossible to get regular people on board with less hasty rushes to judgement.
Lizzo deserves a presumption of innocence, she deserves the ability to continue her career free of mob backlash, obviously that’s impossible, but I believe it in principle. If she’s guilty she should be required to make amends within a reasonable framework and move on. I default back to what I’ve said in earlier pieces, even if every one of these allegations is 100% true, what good does humiliating and tearing this person down do exactly? My entire soul disagrees with what I see Lizzo, her art, and her fans represent, but gun to my head I’m going to support more art in the world, not less, no matter how hollow and inane it may seem. If we want people to leave all this stupid outrage mongering behind, if we want our friends and loved ones to have a path back to redemption, the path has to be built for everyone, even the worst or most annoying offenders. If Lizzo came out the other side of this in our camp, sure she may lose the most psychotic of her fans, but surely a good amount would stay on, and ultimately agree with her, which only helps our cause. There’s such an appetite, understandably, to cancel the cancellers, but I and so many others in their heart of hearts oppose cancellation on principle and we’ve gotta hold that door open for everyone.
When asked about Lizzo in the Hollywood Report piece, midwit feminist Moses and human embodiment of an HR seminar Roxane Gay offered this
“Everyone is always talking about due process, but when it comes to a Black woman who people feel has gone beyond what they assume is possible for her, all of a sudden, due process no longer matters…It’s disappointing if true, and I tend to always err on the side of believing people when they say they’ve been harmed. But I also think that we should perhaps consider that the story may be a little more complicated than the media is portraying it as right now.”
It’s so tempting, to go “oh now all of a sudden you care about due process, go fuck yourself”. It’s so tempting to spike that football and let those who live by this sword die by this sword. Gay has spent her career insisting you can't separate the art from the artist, that we must throw away anyone accused. But my problem is with this sword, these stupid culture wars and gossip cycles that benefit only the most opportunistic and tear people apart. If we can get Roxanne Gay on the due process train, hell, even if we can get her on there just for this time, it’s still going to lead people to us, and some may stay. Yes Roxanne, due process matters, yes we should consider that there’s more to the story. It matters for Lizzo. It also matters for Marilyn Manson. We should consider there’s more to the story always Roxane, whether it’s Lizzo or Johnny Depp. If we’re gracious enough to point out flaws while still offering an off ramp for these hall monitors through compassion, everyone is going to benefit. One less puritan snitch in the world is still a victory.
Are these people hypocrites? Absolutely. Should we do everything in our power to deny them the ability to throw people away? Definitely. Are they bad faith actors whose morality changes in accordance with whatever serves them best? You bet your ass they are. But we should encourage them to be better, there’s an opening here. They are the ones that believe bad deeds in the past disqualify you from humanity, good deeds in the future or redemption. Not us. They are the ones that banish people for a single transgression, not us. They are the ones who enforce strict ideological purity, not us. They are the ones who are unable to resolve conflict without nuance. Not us. Bring them on to our team. Am I ever going to like Roxane Gay? Absolutely not, but we’re trying to build solidarity, If Roxane Gay or Lizzo or any one of these people wants out, wants to stand arm and arm with me against this bullshit, well I’d rather that than stand alone, because it’s that important to me. Ask yourself, what’s more important, ending this infinite cycle public humiliation, or being right?
It’s incredibly difficult to extend grace to the people we think least deserve it, but if we can model it for them, maybe these people will finally grow a spine.